You are not connected. Please login or register

View previous topic View next topic Go down  Message [Page 1 of 1]

1Raze Trevon's Ice-make magic Empty Raze Trevon's Ice-make magic Tue Jun 10, 2014 2:11 pm

Raze Trevon

Raze Trevon
Name: Frozen Fangs
Rank: C-rank
Magic Cost: 20 mp
Requirements: Ice-make Magic
Class: Offensive
Element: Ice
Duration: Instant
Cooldown: 3 posts
Effect: The spell creates three simple looking ice knives, created with one hand. The knives are about the size of a phone. The knives can be concealed in the hand, and thrown at any time. The daggers deal almost no damage when hit, maybe make small cuts. The impact of the knives will cause a small burst of ice spikes. The spikes have almost no range, and won't hit unless the knives hit you directly. The spikes reach out not any further than half a meter. The spikes can cause small bruises, as they have no sharp points as of yet. The knives can be thrown at a range of 10 meters. If the spell is used at a longer range (up to 5 meters extra), the next spell will deal 25% less damage. This attack can be blocked by a D-rank (or higher) shield, or by a D-rank (or higher) spell.

Name: Ice Hexagon
Rank: D-rank
Magic Cost: 10 mp, 5 mp sustained
Requirements: Ice-make Magic
Class: Defensive
Element: Ice
Cooldown: 3 posts
Duration: 2 Posts
Effect: The user slams his hand into the ground, creating a Hexagon made out of ice, the size is about equal to the height of Raze himself. It's not more than 20 centimeters thick. The shield will stay in place for two posts, even when Raze isn't holding his hand behind it. The shield can be broken by either two D-rank or one C-rank spell.

Name: Frost Gauntlet
Rank: D-rank
Magic Cost: 10 mp, sustained 5 mp
Requirements: Ice-make Magic
Class: Supplementary
Element: Ice
Cooldown: 4 posts
Duration: 3 posts
Effect: Covers the lower part of one arm in solid ice, increasing the physical damage dealt by 25%.

Name: Frost Rocket
Rank: D-rank
Magic Cost: 10
Requirements: Ice-make Magic
Class: Offensive
Element: Ice
Cooldown: 3 Posts
Duration: Instant
Effect: The user fires a reasonably large rocket made of ice (about 30 centimeters in length, 15 in width), exploding into shards (20 shards, about the same size as a pencil) after 4 meters. The shards head in the general direction of the rocket for the remaining meter. If the shards were to go outside of it's range, the user will be stuck in place for 2 post. The rocket itself deals bruises and scratches, while the shards only scratch you.

Name: Ice grenade
Rank: D-rank
Magic Cost: 10, 5 mp for detonation
Requirements: Ice-make Magic
Class: Offensive
Element: Ice
Cooldown: 3 posts
Duration: 2 posts
Effect: The user creates a ball of ice, the size of a hand grenade, which, after 2 posts, will explode into ice spikes in every direction. The spikes deal small bruises. The grenade can be thrown for a longer range effect. The max range is 5 meters. The ice melts after 2 posts. The explosion reaches out a meter in each direction.



Last edited by Raze Trevon on Sat Jun 14, 2014 8:06 am; edited 4 times in total

2Raze Trevon's Ice-make magic Empty Re: Raze Trevon's Ice-make magic Wed Jun 11, 2014 2:19 am

Raze Trevon

Raze Trevon
bump

3Raze Trevon's Ice-make magic Empty Re: Raze Trevon's Ice-make magic Wed Jun 11, 2014 3:29 am

Jabo Devine

Jabo Devine

Fangs -

Duration should be, "until destroyed."

How big are the daggers? How big are the ice spikes? How much damage do the ice spikes do? State the complete distance the spell could go and at what distance this 25% less addictive. Also, elaborate on what you mean by that. State that the daggers could be destroyed by a D-Rank spell or higher. The spell could also by any D-Rank or higher defense just so you know.

Ice Hexagon -

Duration should be, "2 Posts or Until Destroyed"

State the dimensions of the shield.

Frost Rocket -

How big is the rocket and the shards? State how many shards there are. Be sure to include how much damage the shards do. State how far the rocket could go. The shards wouldn't be able to travel further than the Max range. I am asking you for a distance because you say if it goes further which it in fact will not, if the proper range isn't stated in the first place.

Ice Grenade -

State the size of the "normal" grenade along with the size of the ice spikes. Include how much damage the spikes would do. Take out the range from the detonation being a 6 meter diameter. If the Max range of the spell is five meters anybody outside of the five meters should be fine. Take out it sticking to surfaces as it's ice. I'd also have you pay a detonation cost and have the ice melt after 2 posts or so.

Bump when edited.


























4Raze Trevon's Ice-make magic Empty Re: Raze Trevon's Ice-make magic Wed Jun 11, 2014 12:15 pm

Raze Trevon

Raze Trevon
Bump

At least one of my spells has nothing to complain about ^^

5Raze Trevon's Ice-make magic Empty Re: Raze Trevon's Ice-make magic Thu Jun 12, 2014 2:44 am

Raze Trevon

Raze Trevon
bump

6Raze Trevon's Ice-make magic Empty Re: Raze Trevon's Ice-make magic Thu Jun 12, 2014 8:31 am

Jabo Devine

Jabo Devine
There were a couple of things I wasn't aware of when grading this the first time around but tis all good now. Just some minor changes aside from what you didn't fix the first time I asked.

Raze Trevon wrote:
Name: Frozen Fangs
Rank: C-rank
Magic Cost: 20 mp
Requirements: Ice-make Magic
Class: Offensive
Element: Ice
Duration: Until destroyed <--- Instant or Sustained (if so be sure to include a numerical value)
Cooldown: 3 posts
Effect: The spell creates three simple looking ice knives, created with one hand. The knives are about the size of a phone. The knives can be concealed in the hand, and thrown at any time. The daggers deal almost no damage when hit, maybe make small cuts. The impact of the knives will cause a small burst of ice spikes. The spikes have almost no range, and won't hit unless the knives hit you directly. The spikes reach out not any further than half a meter. The spikes can cause small bruises, as they have no sharp points as of yet. The knives can be thrown at a range of 10 meters. If the spell is used at a longer range (up to 5 meters extra), the next spell will deal 25% less damage. This attack can be blocked by a D-rank (or higher) shield, or by a D-rank (or higher) spell. <-- State the sum of the ice spikes.

Raze Trevon wrote:
Name: Ice Hexagon
Rank: D-rank
Magic Cost: 10 mp <--- Add sustain cost.
Requirements: Ice-make Magic
Class: Defensive
Element: Ice
Cooldown: 2 posts <--- 3 Posts.
Duration: 2 Posts or Until Destroyed <--- Take out, "until destroyed."
Effect: The user slams his hand into the ground, creating a Hexagon made out of ice, the size is about equal to the height of Raze himself. It's not more than 20 centimeters thick. The shield will stay in place for two posts, even when Raze isn't holding his hand behind it. The shield can be broken by either two D-rank or one C-rank spell.[/color][/font]

Raze Trevon wrote:
Name: Frost Gauntlet
Rank: D-rank
Magic Cost: 10 mp, sustained 5 mp
Requirements: Ice-make Magic
Class: Supplementary
Element: Ice
Cooldown: 4 posts
Duration: 3 posts
Effect: Covers the lower part of one arm in solid ice, increasing the physical damage dealt by 25%.

Approved.

Raze Trevon wrote:
Name: Frost Rocket
Rank: D-rank
Magic Cost: 10
Requirements: Ice-make Magic
Class: Offensive
Element: Ice
Cooldown: 3 Posts
Duration: Instant
Effect: The user fires a reasonably large rocket made of ice (about 30 cnetimeters in length, 15 in width), exploding into shards (20 shards, about the same size as a pencil) after 5 meters. The shards head in the general direction of the rocket for the remaining 5 meters. If the shards were to go outside of it's range, the user will be stuck in place for 2 post. <--- State the damage. State how far the shards can go out of the initial range before self stun happens. You might want to have this explode at 4 meters that way you wouldn't have a self-stun to have the spell be effective basically. But, the last part was a suggestion.

Raze Trevon wrote:
Name: Ice grenade
Rank: D-rank
Magic Cost: 10, 5 mp for detonation <-- It'd just be 5 mp to sustain in general.
Requirements: Ice-make Magic
Class: Offensive
Element: Ice
Cooldown: 3 posts
Duration: 2 posts
Effect: The user creates a ball of ice, the size of a hand grenade, which, after 2 posts, will explode into ice spikes in every direction. The spikes deal small bruises. The grenade can be thrown for a longer range effect. The max range is 5 meters. The ice melts after 2 posts.<--- Include how big the explosion is.

Bump when finished.

7Raze Trevon's Ice-make magic Empty Re: Raze Trevon's Ice-make magic Sat Jun 14, 2014 8:09 am

Raze Trevon

Raze Trevon
bump, i think i fixed it all

8Raze Trevon's Ice-make magic Empty Re: Raze Trevon's Ice-make magic Sun Jun 15, 2014 12:42 am

Jabo Devine

Jabo Devine
Approved.

Sponsored content


View previous topic View next topic Back to top  Message [Page 1 of 1]

Permissions in this forum:
You cannot reply to topics in this forum


  • Total Posts:
  • Total Members:
  • Newest Member:
  • Most Online: Most users ever online was 510 on Tue Nov 05, 2024 5:06 pm

In total there is 1 user online :: 0 Registered, 0 Hidden and 1 Guest
Users browsing this forum: None